Christmas Carols for the Psychologically Challenged

CarolersMy nephew sent me these – they’re making the email rounds and made me grin. Enjoy!

1. Schizophrenia — Do You Hear What I Hear?

2. Multiple Personality Disorder — We Three Queens Disoriented Are

3. Amnesia — I Don’t Know if I’ll be Home for Christmas

4. Narcissistic— Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5. Manic — Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and …

6. Paranoid — Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me

7. Borderline Personality Disorder — Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

8 . Full Personality Disorder— You Better Watch Out, I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout, Maybe I’ll tell You Why

9. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder — Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells …

10. Agoraphobia — I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn’t leave My House

11. Senile Dementia — Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe

12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder — I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

13. Social Anxiety Disorder — Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas while I Sit Here and Hyperventilate