Tessie and I have been resting this long weekend, particularly yesterday and today. She doesn’t go out at all, of course, but I pretty much hibernated and slept in, did laundry, cooked a bit, watched food porn on the Food Network, and let the brain rest.
My original plan for the weekend included putting on gym-appropriate clothes and going to the gym to remind myself what it looked like on the inside. Yes, it’s been that long. But I didn’t go. My gym avoidance syndrome is thriving.
Listening to some of You talk about your workouts and exercise routines, I feel depressed and inadequate rather than inspired. That has nothing to do with you and your successes but it’s about me and my stuck-ness. I want what you have but not enough to make myself go out and do it.
Being the dead of winter isn’t helping. When it was warmer and the light held longer in the afternoons, I walked to/from the car instead of taking the bus, but in the cold and dark late afternoons, I haven’t felt up to doing that, either. And it’s not particularly safe to be wandering around some of the campus or the parking garage in the dark, so it’s not just about my laziness.
My gym has huge ranges of equipment and when I was going, I saw people working away with great gusto. When I tried using it, I found that the machines were not scaled well for me as a short person and it was annoying because the men were able to just sit down and start working out. My Boston gym was for women only and everything was scaled so it worked for us – plus I also knew what I was doing.
One big hang up here is that the personal trainers are available not for a short spurt of sessions but for long-term commitment packages. What I really want is to just pay someone for one or two visits to make sure I know how to use the machines safely – the machines as a step from doing nothing to get back to strength training – and not sign over my first born child for three sessions a week for a year. I need a little bit more nerve to go in and ask for just that.