I tried the innovative step of staying on my food plan for the last seven days and lost a pound. But really, I didn’t care what the scale said. What mattered to me is that I just did it this week, follwing the plan without obsessing about food (seeing, tasting, eating, smelling, tracking, or regretting it).
I’ve been trying hard to not navel-gaze, as my friend Phyllis calls it. It’s hard for me to do because I’ve spent most of my life worrying about food things and my frustration with my body and my eating habits. And of course the result of what the eating actually does, which just gets me into an unhealthy spiral. Yeah, I know all about the need to understand why I’m doing what I do so I can put new habits in place to change.
But honestly, what do I not know about my eating? Not much. My problem isn’t the not knowing, it’s having the self confidence and sense of commitment to myself to actually do something. It’s a lifetime problem and it won’t be resolved overnight. Which is fine.
What matters is that I remember each day why this is important, for my health, comfort and appearance. I am a work in progress; today is just another step along the way. I feel really good about how the week went and didn’t care all that much what the scale said. I pretty much ate what I wanted, including a pad thai lunch and meals out with friends. I read labels and made the choice to not eat some snacks and meals because I knew they weren’t worth the short-term taste. I never felt deprived or overly hungry.
I feel good about myself today.
Random Thoughts of a Disordered Mind 