I present a challenge to my new personal trainer. The good part is that I’m 104 lbs lighter than when I started this journey. But I am badly out of shape and am mostly sedentary, though I do walk more than I used to. Both legs sport ruptured ACL’s and PCL’s, presenting issues with knee stability, and the right knee needs to be replaced in the next few years. I don’t do things on the floor since I can’t get up. My feet are full of arthritis and wearing normal athletic shoes presses on all the sore spots. Those aren’t excuses, just the status quo, along with saggy skin and tight, sore muscles.
But I finally got up the nerve to call the gym to start the process. I’m signed up for a weekly trainer session, beginning this Saturday. The trainer wanted to do the fitness assessment herself, rather than have the head guy do it today. She wants to see my flexibility, strength, range of motion, and endurance as well as have me explain what my current limits and issues are. Lucky for me (actually, this is probably why he wanted me to work with this trainer), she is aqua-certified so we can work on a lot in the pool.
My goal is to be fitter, more toned, and more healthy. To buy myself some time before I get a new knee. To keep the metabolism jump-started to keep the weight loss up (down?). To keep the skin from sagging so much – it will be there, I know, and a lot of it, but more tone in the muscles underneath will go a long way.
But I’m not expecting or wanting to have the hard body of someone who works out two hours a day, six days a week. I’m simply not motivated for that. And I know that will mean that some people, including some of you, will look at me and see pockets of fat that I should work on to get toned to my true potential. Give it up. For me to get there, to the lower end of normal on the BMI scale, I will be down to a weight I haven’t seen since 8th grade. It’s not healthy for me to be there, and it’s not a weight I can maintain without driving myself crazy.
Sometimes I get really depressed reading other blogs when I see how far behind people I am. And then I remember, hey wait, it’s not a contest. Our bodies are different, our goals are different, our lives are different. For me to be my best, I need to ask for help when I need it, and then pay attention and act on what advice I get.
In the meantime, let’s hope my new walking shoes show up soon so my feet don’t hurt. A new bathing suit is on the way so I can take advantage of the pool (my others are all way too big now). And I’m making an appointment for a much-needed massage to help me unknot some of these muscles so they’re ready to work.