I went shopping

My clothes are starting to fall off, which is a good problem but honestly, I have to have something to wear. Most of the smaller things in the closet are for warmer weather which will get here eventually, but I haven’t really wanted to try on sleeveless dresses when I’m cold. But yanno, I need something to wear.

In the back of the closet was a beautiful gored black knit skirt from Coldwater Creek. I loved it too much to give it away even when it sadly became too tight to wear. But guess what? I wore it to work this week! With an aqua knit top from Kohls and a multi-colored kimono as a jacket. Got lots of compliments, felt confident, and kept looking at myself in the bathroom mirror just to be sure I didn’t look fat.

Then I finally did try on the sleeveless dresses, purchased in Connecticut and not worn much here, and guess what? They FIT! I was ready to wear them outside when I remembered it wasn’t sleeveless dress weather and all the little knit bolero jacket things I had were TOO BIG and looked silly.

Yesterday I went to a few discount stores looking for things in sizes I don’t wear now so I can maybe have something to wear when I get into them. If that makes sense. For not much money, I picked up 3 tops. Didn’t try anything on, because hey, they were too small. That was the idea. But when I got home, well, I had to try them on anyway.

And guess what? TWO OF THEM FIT NOW!!

Alright, they will look better with a little more weight gone, but still. I’ve been the same size for so long, and have worn clothes purposely loose because anything clingy made me just feel so fat, that I have no idea what size I really am. It doesn’t help that each of the items I bought was made by a different company and in a different style; you have to actually try on clothes to know if they fit and who wants to do that?

Obviously I am getting there.

One thought on “I went shopping

  1. Mary Lynn

    It’s satisfying to fit into things that you loved. I am glad you are taking care of yourself and I admire your discipline. That has the same root as disciple. I think we associate discipline with rigor and deprivation. The other word might be kinder because it’s about feeling God’s love. He loves us at any size. Tge struggle for me has always been to love and value myself at any size. Hard to feel God’s love when you are filled with self loathing. Then one day you realize you were always valuable and worthy of love and respect and you take care of yourself accordingly. Love you my friend.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s